1.The Ox and the Dog
An ox and a dog serve for the same farmer.One day the dog arrogantly says: “How grand I am! In the daytime, I watch out for the cattle in the meadows; at night, I guard the house. But you…” “Me? How about me ?” the ox says
“You can only plough or draw a cart,” the dog slightly says. “Yes. It’s true,” the ox says. “But if I don’t plough, what do you guard?”
一头牛和一只狗同时为一个农夫工作。
狗骄傲地说着；‘我是多么重要啊！白天我在牧场看护家群，晚上我看家。而你呢…..?” “我？我怎么啦？“ 牛反问。“你只会犁地或是拉扯。”狗不懈地说。“是的。你说得没有错，”牛回答道。“但是如果没有我犁地，你看护什么呢？”

2. A Good Boy
Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?" "I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered. "You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?" "She is the one who sells the candy."
【中文译文】
好孩子
小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。
“昨天给你的钱干什么了？”
“我给了一个可怜的老太婆，”他回答说。 “你真是个好孩子，”妈妈骄傲地说。“再给你两分钱。可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢？”
“她是个卖糖果的。”

3.tooth extraction
“I'm sorry ，Madam ，but I shall have to charge you twenty dollars for pulling your boy's tooth .”
“Twenty d ollars! Why ，I understand you to say that you charged only four dollars for such work!”
“Yes，but this youngster yelled so terribly that he scared four other patients out of the office .”
拔牙
“对不起，夫人，为您孩子拔牙我要收取20美元。”
“20美元！为什么？不是说好只要4美元。”
“是的，但是你的孩子大喊大叫，把另外四个病人吓跑了。”

4. One morning a fox saw a cock.He thought,"This is my breakfast.'' 　　He came up to the cock and said,"I know you can sing very well.Can you sing for me?''The cock was glad.He closes his eyes and began to sing.The fox saw that and caught him in his mouth and carried him away. 　　The people in the field saw the fox.They cried,"Look,look!The fox is carrying the cock away.'' 　　The cock said to the fox,"Mr Fox,do you understand?The people say you are carrying their cock away.Tell them it is yours.Not theirs.'' 　　The fox opened his mouth and said,"The cock is mine,not yours.''Just then the cock ran away from the fox and fled into the tree.
一天早上，一只狐狸看到了一只公鸡。他想：这是我的早餐。 　　他朝公鸡走来，对他说：“我知道，你能唱得非常好听，你能唱给我听么？”公鸡很高兴。他闭上眼睛开始唱歌。狐狸看到这些抓住它放到自己的嘴里走了。 　　在田地里的人们看到了狐狸。大喊大叫：“看，看！狐狸抓住公鸡逃走了。”公鸡对狐狸说：“狐狸先生，你能理解么？人们认为你叼走了公鸡。告诉他们这是你的，不是他们的。” 　　狐狸张开她的嘴说：“公鸡是我的，不是你们的。”就在那时，公鸡逃离了狐狸的嘴巴，跑到了树底下。

5. Making His Mark “刻舟求剑”
A man from the state of Chu was taking a boat across a river when he dropped his sword into the water carelessly. Immediately he made a mark on the side of the boat where the sword dropped, hoping to find it later. When the boat stopped moving, he went into the water to search for his sword at the place where he had marked the boat. As we know, the boat had moved but the sword had not. Isn’t this a very foolish way to look for a sword?
楚国有个人坐船渡江时，他不小心把自己的一把宝剑掉落江中。他马上掏出一把小刀，在宝剑落水的船舷上刻上一个记号。船靠岸后，那楚人立即从船上刻记号的地方跳下水去捞取掉落的宝剑。他怎么找得到 宝剑呢？船继续行驶，而宝剑却不会再移动。像他这样去找剑，真是太愚蠢可笑了。

6. 狗屋 The Dog’ House
英语小故事大道理：It’s easy to put off today what can be done tomorrow. 人们总是今天吧今天应做的事拖到明天 In the wintertime, a Dog curled up in as small a space as possible on account of the cold, determined to make himself a house. However when the summer returned again, he lay asleep stretched at his full length and appeared to himself to be of a great size. Now he considered that it would be neither an easy nor a necessary work to make himself such a house as would accommodate him.
英语小故事带翻译： 冬天时，有一只狗由于寒冷，尽可能地把身子蜷成一团，他下决心一定要为自己建一所房子。可是夏天到来的时候，狗伸直了身子躺着睡觉，把身体尽可能伸展开。现在 他觉得为自己建个适合自己的房子来住实在不容易，也没有那个必要。

7.Sleeping Pills
Bob was having trouble getting to sleep at night. He went to see his doctor, who prescribed some extra-strong sleeping pills. Sunday night Bob took the pills, slept well and was awake before he heard the alarm. He took his time getting to the office, strolled in and said to his boss: "I didn't have a bit of trouble getting up this morning."
"That's fine," roared the boss, "but where were you Monday and Tuesday?"
【中文译文】
安眠药
鲍勃晚上失眠。他去看医生，医生给他开了一些强力安眠药。
星期天晚上鲍勃吃了药，睡得很好，在闹钟响之前就醒了过来。他到了办公室，遛达进去，对老板说：“我今天早上起床一点麻烦都没有。”
“好啊!”老板吼道，“那你星期一和星期二到哪儿去了？”

8.Drunk
One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk." "But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!"
【中文译文】
醉酒
一天，父亲与小儿子一块儿回家。这个孩子正处于那种对什么事都很感兴趣的年龄，老是有提不完的问题。他向父亲发问道：“爸爸，‘醉’字是什么意思？” “唔，孩子，”父亲回答说，“你瞧那儿站着两个警察。如果我把他们看成了四个，那么我就算醉了。” “可是，爸爸， ”孩子说，“那儿只有一个警察呀！”

9.Just after class，a teacher asked to a student"Boy, why have you got cotton in your ear? Is it infected? You look very pain," "No, sir, but you just told me everything my a ear went in one ear and out. so I am trying to stop it."
下课一“孩子，你为什么用棉花塞住耳朵？它感染了吗？” “没有，老师。可是你昨天说你告诉我的知识都是一个耳朵里进，一个耳朵里出，所以我要把它堵在里面。”
就先这么多了